He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
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i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
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Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
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