Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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