so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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