im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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