I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
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Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
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