She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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