Banned from zoo.
Again?
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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