Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
