batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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