That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
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I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
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five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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