dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
