Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
