I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
