I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
