We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
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