Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
