Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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