and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
