I think im going to throw up on grandma
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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