Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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