I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize