If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize