Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the gays at disneyland are vicious
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Randomize