What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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