that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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