Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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