I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
