real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Randomize
