I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
