I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize