Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
