new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
