in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Randomize
