And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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