He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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