guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
