I hate all girls vehemently.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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