I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
thus making me awesome and them whores
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
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