at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
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i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
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he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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