Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
