What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
