I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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