The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
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I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
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I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
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