She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize