Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Randomize