i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
