BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
