I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I have aggressive nipples.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize