so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
where are my eyebrows?
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