That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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